Self Care for People Who Aren't Good at Self Care

Alexandra Kaval
Aug 20, 2019
3 min read

Updated: Jan 12, 2020

These are the days.

So many feels come to mind when I think of this saying (thank you Rachel Allene for creating this adorable mug!)

It's a full season in life right now- being a business owner is hands down THE BEST job I've ever had, but friends, let me tell you- it is not for the faint of heart!

When you're in the midst of one of the very best (but also very busiest!) seasons, it can be easy to neglect your mind, body, & soul.

But as the mug says... these are the days :)

When we're in crazy seasons, we may not be able to control everything that's happening around us, but you know what? We can control our attitude and perspective. And overall, I want to look back on this season with fondness.

I want to set myself up so that I can do great things, but still be gentle with myself in the process.

So earlier this summer, while at the Creative at Heart conference, I sat in on a breakout session on self care (which Rachel taught!), because I had a feeling I could probably do a bit better in this area myself (and wanted to share about the topic with y'all, too!).

During the break out, Rachel posed a powerful question that I think you'll love just as much as I did.

She asked, "What is preventing you from choosing self care?"

For me, my answer (if I'm being totally honest!) was that at times, it can feel like self-care isn't productive.

I have the tendency to believe that doing one more thing, checking one more item off the list would be a better use of my time.

And you know what? That can be tricky, friends!! Sometimes doing more can produce results! And I think we can all agree how fabulous it feels to cross something off a to-do list.

But... it's so good until it isn't.

Until you burn out or become emotionally or physically exhausted.

Neglecting yourself and refraining from self-care... it's not sustainable.

Rachel reminded us that self care is, in fact, one of the best decisions we can make.

She reminded us to remember our value if we are having trouble saying yes to caring for ourselves.

And for us, friends- we are valuable simply because we are a daughter of the King.

No matter what you do or don't do- your identity remains the same.

(I'd recently heard (in regards to describing true identity) that, "If you can lose it, it's not who you are." So good, right?!)

You are important, valued, LOVED, and worth it.

Caring for yourself is a way to honor one of God's most loved creations- you.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. (Psalm 139:14)

Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies. (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

Rachel asked us to each come up with a new self care definition, based on what is life giving to you; based on small practices that bring you joy.

(As you can imagine, hearing everyone share their new definition of self-care was beautiful. And, here's a blog post on How to Bring More Joy to Your Every Day, if you need some ideas to get started on small practices that bring you joy!)

After some thought, I came up with a self care definition that I love. It's to nurture my relationship with God & make space to pause, reflect, and linger.

Those things feel like a piece of heaven to me and feed my soul big-time.

So, what will brings you joy, sweet sister?

What will be your new + revised self care definition?

I pray that you create one that surprises you in the best of ways and that even more importantly... you live it out <3

(Need help? Let's talk on a complimentary clarity call (it's like a mini coaching session!) We can dream together and help you put a plan together for what's next so that you can do the thing!!)

So much love!

Alexandra

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Questions for you!